My fake lesbian Target-loving friend and I had dinner last night. We always joke about how people at Target must think we are a lesbian couple because we shop there together and have kind of couple-like behavior (like we are always on the same page at Target and we buy everything from cute outfits and clearance jeans to cat food and toilet paper. See... lesbians, right?) That coupled with the town we live in makes it funny. (Her husband said that when I move the people at Target will think we've broken up). Anyway, she has a lantern we got on one of our shopping excursions last summer that we had never lit. So last night, post Target, we lit it, had some wine and dinner and sat out on her patio. We are determined to make the most of this time of year, and my last week in this town. My evenings with her (at Target or not) are definitely at the top of the list of things I am going to miss about living here!
It's that time that I have been writing about and thinking about for all these months. One more week here! TMH and I had a fantastic time at the all-important wedding #3, which was beautiful and amazing and such fun. My reading went off without a hitch and I was honored to be part of the day; a friend I have had for 23 years! It was great to see people who have known me for so long in this time of transition. And it was good to see my mother and have a bit of a break with TMH, though of course it went by all too quickly. TMH moves tomorrow (our new place is not even a mile from his current place), and I move next Saturday. I am still trying to tie up all the loose ends at work (they won't let me go!) do dissertation interviews, and get ready to move out. I am selling some of my belongings, which is weird. A very nice couple came by earlier to put down a deposit on my futon (who knew!), which they will pick up tomorrow. So my furniture will start to disappear. I am selling my car, too. Weird. It's all good, though. I am getting excited about the next chapter. It's going to be great for us. So I can look back fondly on my time here and look forward eagerly to the adventures to come. It's all good. But moving sucks no matter what, remember.
Today I went with two other friends (going to miss them so much, too!) to pick up my wedding dress, which now comes equipped with a lovely bustle that is going to be impossible for my girls to figure out. At least the two who were with me now sort of know how it works. I am happy to report that the dress itself fits perfectly. PERFECTLY. So much so that I was worried at my first fitting that I might need to lose a couple of pounds for the dress, and now I realize that because of the way it fits, I really shouldn't lose any. So there. My permission to stay exactly as I am!
In this time of transition and change, of nostalgia and looking forward, it's so nice to think about coming back here to get married.... for so many reasons. In addition to all the joy of the marriage, we'll get the chance to see everyone again and celebrate the specialness of this place.
Friday, May 22, 2009
Monday, May 11, 2009
High Anxiety
May wedding #2 has passed and with it comes the realization that we are almost in the MIDDLE OF MAY. Which means time is running out, and PMP is freaking out. Not as overtly as usual, though. That may come next week. Instead I am trying to adopt the wisdom of TMH and one of my best friends ever... "one step at a time." (Funny how much she and TMH have in common. I discover new items all the time. Really funny. Hah). It's almost like Scarlet O'Hara wisdom. I'll think about that tomorrow. Right. No time to think about it today. If you think about too much at once it's overwhelming and you don't get anything done. Right, PMP, stop it! The result, however, is less blatant whining and more internal nervous stomach. I better not get an ulcer...
Stomach ache. Check.
Quick to grump. Check.
Obsessing about random and unimportant details. Check. (Clearly easier to worry more about insignificant stuff than the big stuff... ridiculous as it may be. So, for example, TMH asks, "why are you talking about this again?")
"More annoyance than usual." Thanks, E, for your perfect words. Check. (Though in my defense the week is set up to bring on more annoyance than usual, as it includes our own particular brand of hell that comes at the end of the semester, and there is not much I can do about that. But, on the flip side, it's the last end of the semester here! I'll have to try not to roll my eyes. Or maybe I can now, since I'm nearly done....only two more REAL days of work. OMG.)
Procrastination. Check. I really just don't know where to begin. Things are getting away from me anyway. I'm either going to catch the bus or get hit by it.
But regardless, at the end of the week I'll be on a forced mini-break, wedding #3, and a quick but much needed trip to the beach. It should do me good! I'll think about the rest of the stress tomorrow, at Tara. Tomorrow is another day.
Stomach ache. Check.
Quick to grump. Check.
Obsessing about random and unimportant details. Check. (Clearly easier to worry more about insignificant stuff than the big stuff... ridiculous as it may be. So, for example, TMH asks, "why are you talking about this again?")
"More annoyance than usual." Thanks, E, for your perfect words. Check. (Though in my defense the week is set up to bring on more annoyance than usual, as it includes our own particular brand of hell that comes at the end of the semester, and there is not much I can do about that. But, on the flip side, it's the last end of the semester here! I'll have to try not to roll my eyes. Or maybe I can now, since I'm nearly done....only two more REAL days of work. OMG.)
Procrastination. Check. I really just don't know where to begin. Things are getting away from me anyway. I'm either going to catch the bus or get hit by it.
But regardless, at the end of the week I'll be on a forced mini-break, wedding #3, and a quick but much needed trip to the beach. It should do me good! I'll think about the rest of the stress tomorrow, at Tara. Tomorrow is another day.
Monday, May 4, 2009
Three Weddings and a Dissertation
May is officially here. It is alternately the month of weddings, the month of finishing up the first half of my dissertation data collection, and the month of closing a significant chapter of my life (i.e, finishing my job, selling my car, and moving in with TMH). Big month!
The May wedding circuit kicked off on Saturday on TMH's home turf. We went to see his oldest friend (from 2nd grade!) get married. It was really fun to meet a lot of TMH's old friends; I don't know this group very well and many of them will be coming to our wedding. The wedding was at an enormous old Catholic church. I haven't been to a lot of Catholic weddings and I really enjoyed it. The church was beautiful and the priest was really funny, and TMH gave a reading (he kept calling it the Prayer of the People. Um, try Prayer of the Faithful. Of course he did a wonderful job). It was one of those weddings where there was a three hour gap between the ceremony and the reception (Just a note: if you don't want people to get completely wasted at your wedding, that's not a good model. What are people supposed to do for three hours? Clearly those reunioning all decided to go to the bar). TMH and I were of course more responsible. We spent the time visiting with his parents, and THEN we went to the bar where Buffalo wings were first made (Really! It's a good story. I am getting to be quite the expert on Central/Western NY. But the accents...). The reception was nice, except that people were pretty drunk/rowdy and the bride and groom had to do their fair share of corralling the wedding party. Now that TMH and I are getting married we are much more attuned to all the nuances that go into a wedding. I also teared up multiple times. Jeez. I barely know these people and I couldn't keep it together; how am I going to be when it is MY good friend (in 2 weeks), much less myself? Weddings have a new meaning for me now. I also started thinking about TMH's family and how they are becoming my family. I feel really lucky on that front. In addition to his parents, we got to see his sisters and my future niece, who is cuter than ever (Aunt P! Aunt P!).
Next weekend we are going to wedding #2, for TMH's good friend from business school. That will be fun because I know many of those people from when TMH and I lived here together. Of course wedding #3 is the big event for me: MY oldest friend (from 6th grade), and the opportunity to go home and see my mom and many of my old friends, and go to the beach.
So, the May wedding circuit is exciting, but exhausting, and in the meantime I have to focus on all of those other big things going on in May. I had a meeting with my advisor on Friday and I have developed a good plan B and C for the dissertation that I plan to implement later on today (no one wants to get an email on Monday morning, right? Monday afternoon or Tuesday is much better, I think). I just have to keep plugging away. Then I am starting to wrap things up at work and figure out my moving arrangements. So far so good on that front as well. So here we go......
The May wedding circuit kicked off on Saturday on TMH's home turf. We went to see his oldest friend (from 2nd grade!) get married. It was really fun to meet a lot of TMH's old friends; I don't know this group very well and many of them will be coming to our wedding. The wedding was at an enormous old Catholic church. I haven't been to a lot of Catholic weddings and I really enjoyed it. The church was beautiful and the priest was really funny, and TMH gave a reading (he kept calling it the Prayer of the People. Um, try Prayer of the Faithful. Of course he did a wonderful job). It was one of those weddings where there was a three hour gap between the ceremony and the reception (Just a note: if you don't want people to get completely wasted at your wedding, that's not a good model. What are people supposed to do for three hours? Clearly those reunioning all decided to go to the bar). TMH and I were of course more responsible. We spent the time visiting with his parents, and THEN we went to the bar where Buffalo wings were first made (Really! It's a good story. I am getting to be quite the expert on Central/Western NY. But the accents...). The reception was nice, except that people were pretty drunk/rowdy and the bride and groom had to do their fair share of corralling the wedding party. Now that TMH and I are getting married we are much more attuned to all the nuances that go into a wedding. I also teared up multiple times. Jeez. I barely know these people and I couldn't keep it together; how am I going to be when it is MY good friend (in 2 weeks), much less myself? Weddings have a new meaning for me now. I also started thinking about TMH's family and how they are becoming my family. I feel really lucky on that front. In addition to his parents, we got to see his sisters and my future niece, who is cuter than ever (Aunt P! Aunt P!).
Next weekend we are going to wedding #2, for TMH's good friend from business school. That will be fun because I know many of those people from when TMH and I lived here together. Of course wedding #3 is the big event for me: MY oldest friend (from 6th grade), and the opportunity to go home and see my mom and many of my old friends, and go to the beach.
So, the May wedding circuit is exciting, but exhausting, and in the meantime I have to focus on all of those other big things going on in May. I had a meeting with my advisor on Friday and I have developed a good plan B and C for the dissertation that I plan to implement later on today (no one wants to get an email on Monday morning, right? Monday afternoon or Tuesday is much better, I think). I just have to keep plugging away. Then I am starting to wrap things up at work and figure out my moving arrangements. So far so good on that front as well. So here we go......
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